(Just to inform the uninformed.)
I find it highly amusing on a very masochistic level that I would aspire to a career that primarily deals with technological advances and improvements when it's incredibly obvious that technology wants nothing to do with me. Technology probably considers me that annoying neighbour that knocks on the door to borrow a cup of sugar when it's trying desperately to have mad bondage sex with society.
Well, society's a whore.
So I bring you this episode of FFR from the lovely cement confines of my workplace, due to the fact that now that my computer finally works, the internet has decided to vacation somewhere where people would rather watch bestiality videos and chicken battles than do their homework and, I don't know, write about music.
It's okay, internet. I understand. Bitch.
Now, since I've written a long and offensive ramble on my rocky relationship with technology &c, it's time for me to post some songs that would be perfect for the impending killer robot invasion that I've undoubtedly encouraged. (Which is basically an excuse for me to dump a bunch of angry industrial tracks on your doorstep like a sack of flaming poo. But this is quality poo, yeah?)
Apoptygma Berserk - Electronic Warfare (mp3|9.16MB): I'm pretty sure that if I were ever to play this album in the car, I would have speeding tickets spilling over the seats. As it is, I drive what could basically be considered a soccer mom van, and it doesn't really like speeds. This, as you can imagine, would be extremely frustrating with music like this. Early hyper-thrashbeat Apop is hyper and thrash-y, and there are some occasions when no other music will suffice. You can easily picture having this on your iPod while running away from fire-breathing robots through dark, damp alleys as they hunt you for your offensive visceral bits, right? That's what I thought.
(from the 1998 album Apopcalyptic Manifesto)
Cesium 137 - Darkest Dream (mp3|11.69MB): Some of CS137's stuff sounds a little like something out of a canned drum kit, but I will stand by this track until the day I die. The melody is just distorted enough, and the insanity is so well-distributed that I can't imagine not listening to this while I'm in One of Those Moods. The synth itself croons out a song and the human voice is the sample. I thought it was ultimately appropriate.
(from the 2001 album Advanced/Decay)
Dismantled - Essence (mp3|10.83MB): So this song is creepy as hell. Just putting it out there. It's one of the only industrial tracks I've come across that's made me want to keep looking over my shoulder. It's the kind of song you'd hear when you're standing in the middle of the street, alone, with the streetlamps beaming down just enough light against the wet pavement to show your shadow. You can see your breath in the chilled air, and your eyes are wide. Then, suddenly, it's there right behind you, and you're running for your life. The fact that the voice keeps getting raspier and more insistent and more, well, batshit crazy, coupled with the increasing tempo - it doesn't exactly sooth the mind and soul. Highly recommended!
(from the 2004 album Post Nuclear)
Front Line Assembly - Nine Times (mp3|11.81MB): Ever wonder what it would sound like if the guys from Fujiya & Miyagi were chased by killer robots? This is pretty much it. Not that I would ever encourage such an occasion, but the imagery is great. And Front Line Assembly has that awesome early-electronica Kraftwerk-y feel to a good portion of their stuff, so it's even more endearing. The random disbursement of metallic shrieks is a nice touch to a song that practically screams "We Are the Robots."
Best thing about that whole last paragraph? The fact that Kraftwerk is now an adjective. Hell. Yes.
(from the 1992 album Initial Command)
UCNX - Presence (mp3|10.10MB): This album is infuriating for no other reason than I wish I would have listened to it in 2008. The electronic blend is almost as hypnotic as Burial, and the very human vocals almost add to the post-apocalyptic dehumanised atmosphere that a lot of industrial music tries to convey. This track makes my head spin in such a good way, though, because in the middle of it you have like, Billy-Joel-as-a-robot playing a short break, and then all of a sudden it's back into this amazing syncopated assembly-line style synth forte, and I really can't describe it any better than that.
(from the 2008 album Absolute Zero)
Anyway, that's it. Just in time, too, 'cause I think I hear blowtorches and the water in the toilet seems to be rippling with ground shocks. Before I go, though, I'd like to thank my co-DJ Chris for tearing his attention away from the Brillo pads and Orange Clean to cover for me last Friday. Without him, this blog would be a cold, desolate place.
Well, hope he survives the destruction. Cheers!
As always, send lovemail/hatemail/anymail related to the Friday Five to fridayfiveradio@gmail.com. Requests are always considered and welcomed. See you next w -
[fizzle]
[transmission terminated]
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